Roswila's Dream & Poetry Realm

SEE ALSO: TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT (photos, realistic to abstract)

Wednesday, December 31, 2008


Shawms, also known as Zurnas (see December 23rd below for details and dreamku)

Sigh. This was a very difficult month. Too many activity and friendship commitments. I can especially see relationship difficulty in many of the below ‘ku and tanka. Some of the earlier dreams/kus came days and even weeks before I was conscious of certain issues they had been trying to bring my attention to. This one below, though, was clear to me as I recalled the dream. I wrote the dreamku only a couple of hours before one friendship finally clearly broke apart:

swimming along
the shallow side of the pool
hitting bottom

“Shallow” puzzled me a little bit, as our friendship has been nothing if not deep. Then it occurred to me it was saying there wasn’t far to go before it all bottomed out, in fact I was already touching it. This bottom, though, does now contain the hope that we may yet remain friends. However right now I’m in a “wait and see” space, as I go through a lot of sadness for us both.


December 1, 2008


Jamie Lee Curtis
leads our exercise class
I can't keep up

she hands each of us
a purple jacket to put on
extra long sleeves

I'm anxious to prove
that she's wrong
I bumble the exercises

they crowd me against the wall ... deflation

[dreamku series on one dream; that last line is a one-liner or "monoku," a form even haiku are now being written in sometimes]

December 2, 2008

I cheat with him once
does that make us a couple
he seems to think so

December 3, 2008

a young black woman
stands with the light behind her
in a gauzy gown
I exclaim that her long legs
and curves are so beautiful

[dream tanka]

December 4, 2008

a young woman and I
seduce a perturbed older man
pushing fun icons
I reach for: Reincarnation
of the Tiger*

[dream tanka]

*My immediate association to this was to that famous story "The Lady or the Tiger." LOL!

December 5, 2008

into the open air
to clear our cell connection
the slim waning moon

December 6, 2008

sky flying, no plane
the wind pushes me past home
on the oceanfront
my arms and legs tiring I
struggle to get back on path

[dream tanka]

December 7, 2008

he suddenly dumps
huge piles of books on the floor
of the library
held hostage by his displays
I feel concern for him, too

[dream tanka]

December 8, 2008

tight places
trying to tease strings out of
pockets and tangles

December 9, 2008

the lampshade they painted
with blue and purple glitter
years old birthday gift

December 10, 2008

laid across his lap
“You could play drums
on this sweet tight butt”

December 11, 2008

the house painters
threw out my copious files
the old cartons remain
my shock turns into great ire
how dare they do this to me

she’s not affected
by my mounting rage at their
cavalier treatment
she says that the files were moved
as they needed the space

but how will I get
the files back in their right boxes
they still had no right

[two dream tanka & one dreamku on one dream]

December 12, 2008

the intriguing artist
and I don’t want to talk
a laughing baby

December 13, 2008

I watch the woman shop
and assume each thrift store buy
is for herself
but she hands them all to me
as early Christmas gifts

sizes don’t matter
we agree the orange-scented
cleaner is quite good

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

December 14, 2008

I enter the bath
all the many lights are on
I turn each one off
the one above the tub’s hard
to get at but I do

what must her husband
have thought when she asked for it
that light by the tub

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

December 15, 2008

invitation to
the new painting-singing class
unprepared teacher

December 16, 2008

dark earth tumbles from
the small hole in the felled tree
what’s emerging

[This dreamku is a good example of how writing dreamku can often lead to some important understanding of the dream. In this case, I initially used the word "log" instead of "felled tree" but not only was the syllable count unsatisfying, I knew it needed more description. When the words "felled tree" occurred I suddenly realized my identification with that tree and the emotional turmoil I've been going through recently.

December 17, 2008

he asks for someone
to be his ballet student
a small fat woman
innocently volunteers
his obvious chagrin

[dream tanka]

December 18, 2008

reviewing reveals
she stole leather slacks from
the foundational dig
a male voice proclaims that
her arrogance tripped her up

[dream tanka]

December 19, 2008

no time off
computer glitches repeat
in my dreams*

*I'm not at home so don't have my dream resources from which to write a new dreamku or tanka, and this is my first time online all day (7:00 pm). Which is by way of explaining why I'm posting a dreamku from April 2006. It's eerily timely now, as I've been noting how much more clearly I'm seeing my daily issues reflected in my dreams. I'm having an increasing problem with my second-hand flat screen monitor, so the subject of this dreamku is even rather applicable.

December 20, 2008

he says from behind
he wishes he’d get it up
yet what do I feel
against my butt answering
my own arousal

a ghost male’s member
rises firmly between us

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

*Sex dreams are frequently not about sex, or rather not only about sexuality. In this case, this dream is very much about how my own "standing up" for myself is becoming an extremely important issue,

December 21, 2008

voices on the stairs
outside my apartment door
stuffing my wet clothes
in the bathroom wastebasket
to hide them away

I open the door
before my good friend knocks
her “oh” of surprise

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

December 23, 2008

the finger holes on
the dark shawm* are way too big
and too far apart
my small fingers cannot reach
much less cover them to play

on the shawm’s underside
smaller close holes in a row
now I make music

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

*The zurna is a middle-eastern wind instrument. Also called a shawm, it was played by medieval musicians. I believe it was a shawm I played around with many years ago, and it makes a very sharp loud sound (at least in my newbie hands :-D). In the dream, when I finally got some sound out of it I had to work a bit more to get a middle-eastern sort of belly-dance music sound. At the top of this post is a picture of some zurnas; the darker ones look very much like the one in the dream written about above, except that it was brass.

December 24, 2008

she tells me I should
take all of my clothes off
a loft gathering

his perturbed hello
a man who'd seen me naked
before I backed out

[two dreamku on one dream]

December 25, 2008

the anxious actress
prepares to take a leap
for the movie shot
the dark ground and narrow stream
constructed from brown carpet

clearly she can make
the short leap across the stream
her hesitation
the wall rising straight up
from the stream’s opposite bank

[two dream tanka on one dream]

December 26, 2008


the small dark man
makes intense love to me
open door

an old friend
wrongly believes he's dying
I just crave sex

very muddy shoes
my lover says they'll find
and hose me off

I want to be found
but don't want them to know it
large empty closet

*[a dreamku series on one dream from 3/28/08; I don't want to go into all the details, but this dream is proving to have had some clairvoyant elements to it. It also illustrates the problem with clairvoyant dreams -- at least for me. I'm rarely able to identify precognition at the time of the dream. It's only apparent when something from a dream clearly occurs. I suppose this is not truly a problem -- again, for me at least -- as I have nothing invested in "knowing the future." I just find it intriguing that we humans can sometimes do this. Even in my Tarot work I rarely look for future information, but focus on obtaining advice and guidance for my "here and now" issues. Which is precisely what I do with my dream work. Any looking to the future is more like that which we all do when trying to understand the possible consequences to decisions we are pondering.]

December 27, 2008

old workplaces
empty even of sorrow
the past laid to rest*

*[This dreamku was posted previously, on July 16, 2006. I've been yearning for this sort of emptiness recently. Sigh. I also keep recalling an expression I saw on a poster in a psychotherapist's office many, many years ago: The only way out, is through.]

December 28, 2008

what was she
that toddler – a fairy child?
dream recorded too late

December 29, 2008

the souls of dead mice
till the dark earth
what will grow here?*

*[Although written two years ago and posted on May 3, 2006 here, this one has a resonance now for me: the time of year and the changes in my life ... plus those souls of dead mice -- as opposed to living ones -- has always intrigued me. I'm not as spooked by mice as many of my women friends, but I would not say I particularly like them and certainly don't want them in my home space. The mouse souls in this dream, though, are in their more natural habitat and doing something that can support new growth. So the dream/ku has always felt rather positive to me. Much like one of the basic meanings for The Death card in the Tarot: clearing away the old so that the new can grow.]

December 30, 2008

swimming along
the shallow side of the pool
hitting bottom

December 31, 2008

she somehow affords
to visit me cross country
this much missed best friend
someone claims it’s not for me
but to attend a health fair

her acquaintance’s
assumption that she knows all
a swipe I duck under

[dream tanka & dreamku on one dream]

* * * *

‘til next time, keep dreaming,

**** [aka: Patricia Kelly] **** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”)****My other blogs: ROSWILA’S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL and ROSWILA’S TAIGA TAROT, and Yahoo DREAMJIN: Group for Dreamku – Haiku-Like Dream Poems ****

Labels: , , , ,