Roswila's Dream & Poetry Realm

SEE ALSO: TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT (photos, realistic to abstract)

Friday, July 02, 2010


This month begins and ends with days of photos without accompanying dreamku. The only obvious common influence is that these two groups are each several days post-full moon. But that phase has not historically been one that effects me. So I’m more inclined to chalk it up to plain old-fashioned coincidence.

This sample below is from June 18th, and is fairly representative of my emotional stance throughout this month:


nazi-like soldiers
have invaded our homeland
we start burying
all that we deeply value
so that they’ll not destroy it

I chop a thick dark
stack of creative writing
into squarish chunks
they fully fill a wood box
I bury in the sweet earth

instructions inside
the box of writing
teach a magic spell:
how to resurrect it whole once
freely brought to light again

I don’t believe that burying is always an appropriate or effective response. Though I will add that sometimes it may be very necessary and helpful. The trick is knowing when it’s a positive move, and when it’s avoidance or an attempt to hurt others in some way.

It would be nice to end this intro on a positive note but I’m hard pressed at the moment to come up with one. The best I can say is “This, too, shall pass.” Or as one of the meanings for The Four of Pentacles puts it: The only stability is change.


[PLEASE NOTE that in most browsers you can click on the image for a larger version.]

June 1, 2010

[Was up rather early to go visit my friend in the hospital after her hip replacement surgery. Then got "volunteered" to do a shift in our Corner Store so I'm making this post late in the afternoon. Therefore, no dreamku. There's no particular reason I've chosen this photo to post today except that I like it. When I looked at it for this post I thought "Leave it to life to find a spot to sprout in the most unwelcoming setting." Image by Roswila]

June 2, 2010

[I'd thought for sure I'd already posted this old photo (8-09) here, but I haven't. I took gazillions of other really poor shots of this very busy bee among the roses, and with my old camera. I love how you can see the shine on its little butt. I'm still sometimes surprised today at what digital cameras can capture. Image: "Coming in for a Landing" by Roswila]

June 3, 2010


she reads the written
notes by the observer:
Jungian Shadows

we always have three:
one leaving, one coming in,
one fully active

each dark one not
separate from the other
they form a spiral
a narrow serpentine strip
that winds upward from our feet

[two dreamku and a tanka on a dream of 6-2-10. Image by Roswila]

June 4, 2010


I hear it said
that life is never a beach
a group gathers
by the sea in these fearful
times to share a small meal

my hunger grows
and my courage deserts me
rumors abound of
piles of food stashed away
in a locked office building

I flee the beach
for the city offices hoping
to seal myself
safely away from roaming
bands of thieves and killers

to find one of those
office pantries for myself
and live alone there
with lots of food and a locked
empty building I’ll be safe

[four tanka on a dream of 6-4-10. Image by Roswila]

June 5, 2010


the doctors promise,
winking at each other
thinking I don’t see,
they will make her stay away
my faithful wan Rosalee

but I don’t want her
to stop visiting in the
damp and musty nights
for who will then come to me
who will climb past the roses

the white roses that
ramble up the brick staircase
to my balcony
this old Venetian outlook
over dark rippling water

no one else will climb
by these pale open faces
that shiver when passed
blooms only she and I see
under the sheltering night

and who will ever
again breathlessly await
with me through the dark
for the only red rose to
open in this pale welter

this mysterious
pin prick in bloodless blossoms
nothing like the one
the doctors will foist upon me
in their sterile white coats

I watch the water
reflect moonlight and roses
from my balcony
Rosalee will come one last time
perhaps I will leave with her

[tanka series on a dream of 6-4-10. Not only was I experiencing this dream from an observing position, yet still in the “I’ of the dream, but I was starting to organize it for writing about it. E.g, as I woke I was working with the idea of the one red rose as a pin prick among the bloodless ones. I have no urge to do much analysis of this dream/ku. I’m feeling it would be like trying to explain a joke, the life would seep out of it. Image by Roswila]

June 6, 2010


digging out curtain
after curtain from the closet
each less faded than
the former but none are quite
what I’m looking for

still I hang these
red rose print drapes one in
front of the other
space between for air and
so they’ll fall without wrinkles

sunrise approaches
will the light coming through
be any rosier

[two tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 6-5-10. Image by Roswila]

June 7, 2010


plein-air gathering
the parrot looks like it must
be part vulture

large and quite ugly
it keeps dive bombing us
worse than other pests
it might really hurt someone
killing it is discussed

a dark young woman
starts aiming a bug spray gun
as it swoops around
some shots hit, some miss, making
it soggy and very angry

I know these sprays
take time to have effect
if they work at all
have we only made things worse
with this maddening parrot

it finally succumbs
all wet and stinking of spray
it thuds to the ground

guilt crashes with it
I say I wish I’d expressed
my reservations
my sense that we might be
over-reacting to this pest

my point’s not well-taken what does it matter now

and then only I see
the parrot’s clinging to life
feathers falling off
clearly dizzy and quite ill
it struggles to stand up

what have we done
in the name of self-defense
nausea rises

[tanka, dreamku, and a monoku on a dream of 6-6-10. Image by Roswila]

June 8, 2010



The family of dark ones seduces
with whispers and tortured logic
all those whom they envy or desire.

But in the end, the empath
defeats herself with self-doubt,
and accepts the dark heart
of this unkind kindred as her own.

Marrying into their lost family,
she grows great with child,
and so too, with magical powers.

Power that all but eclipses her empathy,
the gift with which she was born,
and for which the dark ones
hunted her down.


Outside ancient castle ruins,
members of the empath's true family
anxiously await her visit,
which they have managed at last
with well-placed bribes and subtle spells.

Beneath the barest slice of moon,
one paces trailing shadows and dust,
another gathers wild herbs and flowers
with which to greet her, and yet another
stands alert beside a massive grey steed,
silently beseeching The Deities
that there yet be time to rescue her
from the lost ones.


Our empath arrives in a flash of magic.
How beautiful she is!
An ebon-haired goddess in the envious darkness,
accompanied by six false sisters in their limp pale gowns.

Six deaf sisters who cannot hear
even the clamor they make
as they screech and flap hungrily
around her, bloodless magpies
drawn by her glamour.

Our empath raises one hand
in abrupt dismissal
and the six false sisters disappear.

Such power! If only it could be
turned to healing her heart!

Our own hearts are leavened
with hope as she smiles at us,
the hand of dismissal resting at her side.

“I have now what I did not know
I wanted,” she says.

She cups her other hand
over the full moon of her belly
and looks tenderly down.

Sharp hope courses through us.

When those eyes we have so missed
are raised to ours again,
what decision will we see there.

Will she leave with us,
will she take that wild ride down the rivers
of our shared blood, back to her own heart?

Or will she stay?

[not dreamku, this is a narrative poem based on a dream of 4/7/00. It’s one of those poems of mine that I have a fondness for -- most I am not so attached to once they’ve been around a while. However, it hasn’t ever generated much good response from others. It was once suggested that it isn’t really a poem as it doesn’t have a lot of simile or metaphor. At the time I said the entire poem is a metaphor since it’s a dream. That didn’t go over very well, even when I also pointed out that images like "bloodless magpies" and the “full moon of her belly” are metaphors, and beyond that, that there are even such things as narrative poems that tell stories. Ah well, I’ll stop defending this poem. I’m posting it here today as I don’t recall any of my dreams from last night; though I do remember waking up at one point feeling it was a more relaxed night of dreams than I’ve had in a while. Image by Roswila]

June 9, 2010


her long-time lover
flees their southern estate
his alligator skin
like a shiny brown shell
and with a strong odor

he drags her along
with him to a wood frame house
her male friend tracks them
determined to rescue her
from her lover-on-the-run

then quite suddenly
by the door to the basement
she almost stumbles
over his alligator skin
in an empty messy heap

her male friend arrives
just in time to watch as she
sees the back of her
lover’s human skinned form
escaping down the stairs

what’s more surprising:
that the skin could be shed and
reveal a human
or that he’d left this big mess
for her and her friend to clean up

[tanka series on a dream of 6-8-10. I just saw some of Jung’s “Red Book” on a T.V. show last night. It’s by Jung about his darkest disturbing dreams and visions, in both paintings and words. In a very small way, this blog serves at times as my own “Red Book.” Image by Roswila]

June 10, 2010

the baby lets out
huge sneeze after huge sneeze
on his mother’s lap
between each he laughs and grins
her knitted brow shows concern

[tanka on a dream of 6-8-10. Image by Roswila]

June 11, 2010


the tall blonde woman
willow wand graceful and slim
accepts a blind date
her reservations about him
held in her quiet eyes

to her surprise
he says he’s also courting
her ailing best friend
without rancor she quickly ends
the discomfiting date

[two tanka on a dream of 5-9-10. Image by Roswila]

June 12, 2010


a young little boy
comes up to me in the street
he wants attention

this city urchin
holds something in his closed hand
is it a weapon

then we get friendly
he shows me around the streets
teaching me panhandling

* * * * * * * *

my long gone uncle
sits next to me in the crowd
concert audience

they begin playing
An American in Paris
we all know the tune
and hum happily along
but my uncle stays silent

is he impressed
with the show or maybe that
I know the music
he talks to a man in front
does he even hear the music

[dreamku and tanka on two separate dreams of 6-11-10. Image by Roswila]

June 13, 2010


my ninety year young
dearest friend and I prepare
for a night on the town
we commiserate about
how long everything now takes

making no admission
but still acknowledging
by not denying it
she wants a new lover
just as much as I do

dressed to kill some things never die

[two tanka and a monoku on a dream of 6-12-10. Image by Roswila]

June 14, 2010


to my amazement
I win six hundred dollars
again entering
the on-going lottery
he and I win twelve thousand

where’s my half of it
and where’s the six hundred
that’s all mine

[one tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 6-13-10. Image by Roswila]

June 15, 2010

[Didn't have any dream recall this morning and haven't even had to time to post a picture until now, late in the day. It was an adventuresome morning to say the least. Got my first shot of cortisone in my arthritic right knee. My major weapon against arthritis pain is continuing to lose weight. However, in the interim I do need some relief. I've been finding it harder and harder to walk at more than a halting crawl, even using more and more OTC pain meds. So cortisone feels like it might be a viable alternative while I lose a whole lot more weight. This photo, by the way, is of some of my favorite growing things. Every time I pass this particular group of striped leaves the different light and wind (or lack thereof) has changed them. Image by Roswila]

June 16, 2010


the group novel gets
circulated between us
each adds their writing
to this ongoing effort
created by hands and hearts

a new editor’s
appointed after each round
a potpourri grows

handwritten entries
in black pen fill each page
a graphologist
would be in heaven
analyzing this collection

there are numerous
endings and each makes sense
both as a chapter
and when the entire story
is read from the beginning

[three tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 6-15-10. I think this dream, among other things, addresses how we each are different, but add something to the whole. The poet Walt Whitman said it far better in his “Crossing Brooklyn Ferry” ending: “You furnish your parts toward eternity; Great or small, you furnish your parts toward the soul.” In looking for these exact lines I found an interesting commentary on this lengthy poem in SparkNotes. And given this dream about being part of a whole seems to have been precipitated by an intense bodily experience (e.g. the two shots in my knee -- one for the pain of the second [cortisol]) -- these lines in the commentary seem particularly apt: “....this leads Whitman to turn to the physical as a locus for identity: ‘I too had receiv’d identity by my body, / That I was I knew was of my body, and what I should be I knew I should be of my body.’ The body is both a vehicle for individual specificity and a means by which to partake of common experience: it is where the self and the world come together.” Image by Roswila]

June 17, 2010


the mountain road home
is snowed over and rutted
by other tire tracks
our driver stays in the ruts
as he wrestles with the wheel

in my mind’s clear eye
I see a torn back left tire
the van lurches on
as the tire flaps in the snow
but our driver won’t give up

* * * * * * * *

one plays the black hole
game by tossing a chit into
its narrow entrance
his toss lands on the right side
to win a lot of money

but he keeps asking
whether his landing’s a win
we cannot tell him
as we’re employees hired
only to monitor the game

we each drop crumbs by his chit
hinting and hinting
that he’s got the big win
he’d been seeking

[two dream tanka series on two separate dreams of 6-17-10. Image by Roswila (this 35 year old Star Trek poster says "Keep on Trekin'" and it was one of the first things I put up as I was moving in to my new rooms.)]

June 18, 2010


nazi-like soldiers
have invaded our homeland
we start burying
all that we deeply value
so that they’ll not destroy it

I chop a thick dark
stack of creative writing
into squarish chunks
they fully fill a wood box
I bury in the sweet earth

instructions inside
the box of writing
teach a magic spell:
how to resurrect it whole once
freely brought to light again

[tanka series on a dream of 6-17-10. Image by Roswila]

June 19, 2010


she did not bend
the bars way out like this
rod iron fence

will they believe she knows who bent them sitcom star

she pushes them back
in place with great effort
only one won’t budge
it’s out of place no matter
how she wrestles with it

[dreamku, monoku, and tanka written 3-31-10 on dream notes of 7-20-07. Image by Roswila]

June 20, 2010

why’s Michael Jackson
in this murky spinning dream
I look behind me

balance returning
I see his partner Britney Spears
what a troubling pair

[two dreamku on a dream of 6-20-10. Happy Father’s Day, Dad. I have a lot to thank you for. Most of all, for having witnessed your joy in being creative. It encouraged and guided me in my own efforts, and still does. Image by Roswila]

June 21, 2010


the young geek and I
start to have sex in his car
what does it matter

to my utter surprise
we actually enjoy it
tender afterglow

[two dreamku on a dream of 6-21-10. Today is Summer Solstice. And the image I always have in mind for this day is of a Lipizanner stallion at the top of his leap -- from here it's all down hill. Image by Roswila]

July 22, 2010

the blonde young girl
has never performed on stage
though she’s a member
of a traveling family
of accomplished liars

they assume her success her fear of failure

[tanka and monoku written in April 2010 on a dream of 4-15-10. No dream recall from last night. Image by Roswila].

July 23, 2010

tall and narrow
a city building’s to be
totally redone
will it be razed and rebuilt
or have a new facade put on

the latter I think the former’s too much work

[tanka and monoku written 3-31-10 on a dream of 8-2-07. I had this dream only two months before I made my cross country visit to the retirement community I ultimately moved into in California in February of ‘08. Image by Roswila]

July 24, 2010

we flirt a little
sitting in the cab of his truck
handsome young driver

others think we’re paired
I am not certain what I want
or where we’re going

I put one foot out
the door just as he kisses me
there’s a pregnant blonde
sitting behind the wheel
is she leaving the truck

he turns toward her my foot stays out the door

[two dreamku, a tanka, and a monoku on a dream of 6-22-10. Image by Roswila]

June 25, 2010


she enters a room
followed by her sleek black cat
it wanders away

she and another
person search to retrieve it
adjacent space

she turns around
the black cat waits behind her
lolling on the floor
light shines in its glossy fur
and muscles ripple beneath

it has not will not run away fearless friend

[two dreamku, a tanka, and a monoku on a dream of 6-22–10. Image by Roswila]

June 26, 2010

the villains
closet the full moon
lunatic fringe

[re-post of an old dreamku written on a dream of 6-19-06. No dream recall from last night and nothing awaiting posting that I feel drawn to, so I'm re-using the above dream/ku. The full moon comes in today and for the first time in a long time I didn't suffer PMS (i.e., pre-moon syndrome). Actually, it's hard to tell given all that's been going on, just how much influence the waxing gibbous phase may have had or not had this past week. At any rate, I recall this little dream and am as amused now as I was four years ago when I had it. Image by Roswila]

June 27, 2010


my husband and I
along with our toddler son
watch television
in our nicely furnished
1950's ranch style home

the telephone rings
I rush to answer it as
I know it’s for me
a call from the secret half
of my double life

holding the phone
I speak with my head bowed
into the closed blinds
carefully muffling my voice
so as not to be heard

my pimp expresses
concern about having called
my whispered response:
just as long as my husband
and son never find out

[four tanka on a dream of 6-27-10. Image by Roswila]

June 28, 2010

[No dream recall and no time to select an older one to post. So here's a recent find among my photos. I'd tried to catch this bee as its work with out any success. Then noticed much later during editing the batch of pix that I'd caught it mid-air. Why is snapping bees so enticing? Yes, there's the challenge but there's something more to it. Image: “I’m Outta Here!” by Roswila]

July 29, 2010

[Still no dream recall and no time to select an older one to post. So here's a photo I'd forgotten about and came across when selecting pix for a small exhibit I'm having during July in the retirement community I live in. I have over 3,000 photos now. And although I don't actually think more than a few dozen are all that good, it was still quite a challenge to whittle down the ones I wanted to share. This one did not make the final cut for the exhibit. But it's of one of my several favorite growing things around here: a fiddle head fern. That pinkish wall behind it fooled the camera into making the fern greener than it was actually. So in addition to the patterns, the colors are sort of fun. Image by Roswila]

June 30, 2010

[Awful headache that kept waking me up, so all I wanted to do was take more aspirin and get back to sleep. Forget about sketching out any dreams (which I may do later if they haven't escaped me all together). This pic is rather the opposite of what's outside my window today -- what we call "June Gloom," sort of hazy. It usually burns off by mid-day. Hope my headache leaves with the gloom. Image by Roswila]

* * * *

‘til next time, keep dreaming,

**** [aka: Patricia Kelly] **** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”)****My other blogs: ROSWILA’S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL and ROSWILA’S TAIGA TAROT, and Yahoo DREAMJIN: Group for Dreamku – Haiku-Like Dream Poems ****