SO MUCH (Dream-Based Poem) & WRITING EXERCISE
(based on dream of 6/12/07,
with gratitude to William Carlos Williams)
so much depends
an old white
left on the
beneath the dark
The line "left on the back porch" was originally "left on the lanai" as it was my parents' lanai of many years ago that was in the dream. But this felt problematic. The alliteration created a hitch in the flow of the piece, as did the word lanai itself. So here's where I had to make a decision: do I stay truer to my dream or to the poem? I decided "back porch" is, in effect, the same thing as "lanai": an exposure of sorts, something more outside, where the possibility of light is greater. How's that for a poet's rationalization? :-D And ultimately I realized back porch actually increased the poem's truthfulness with respect to my dream since it offers an association to the past (behind us). Although my initial use of lanai was a reference to something from my past, a reader could not have known that.
I did not set out to write using Williams's famous and wonderful poem as the frame. It just popped out as I set pen to paper to write a dreamku. However, I'm extremely glad my subconscious did toss up his poem as after drafting my take-off, I read and re-read his to get as close as possible to his rhythm and music, as well. That helped me more thoroughly appreciate this familiar poem more than I ever had before. For anyone not familiar with his poem, here it is:
a red wheel
glazed with rain
beside the white
What an exercise in writing poetry this all was, and even moreso in reading it -- really sitting with a poem and listening over and over to its meanings, resonances, and music; taking the time to fully savor it. I do this with most poetry I read, but when I was doing it in an effort to "reproduce" this poem's structure my receptivity was heightened even more. You might try this sometime if you haven't. Using a famous favorite poem (or this one by Williams), write your own as closely "after" it as possible, without losing your own beneath it. It need not, of course, be dream-based. That's just my peculiar bent. :-D I'd love to hear of your experiences with this exercise and see any results you'd like to share.
Resource: About Williams Carlos Williams.
‘til next time, keep dreaming,
[aka: Patricia Kelly]
****If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”)****My other blogs ROSWILA’S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL and ROSWILA’S TAIGA TAROT.