SPITTING MAD (photomorph) & WHAT IS LEFT (tanka dream series) by Roswila

WHAT IS LEFT

the meeting's hard enough
to endure, but why does he keep
spitting on the top
of my head? not to mention no one else
cares he's disrupting this big meeting

yikes! another man
standing near by, staring angrily
at me? what the fuck?
no peace, no respect, even in this
community meeting space?

I suppose some men
have no pride, maybe even no way
of keeping their shit
to themselves, much less of addressing
me in private, where it should be aired

what is left for me
to do? sequester myself completely,
like a prisoner
in solitary confinement? maybe that's it:
cold brick walls can't spit or stare


[tanka series on a dream of 5-9-18. Found some wide ranging possibilities for the meaning of spitting in dreams, e.g., here. Searching for staring symbolism also resulted in many different ways of understanding it. Relating to dreams and to the Tarot are often very similar and this is one of those ways: I have to let my intuition point me to what means the most in a sea of possible meanings. Here in this dream/poem, I stick with my gut sense that both acts indicate anger, layered over/hiding a lot of denial of theirs that is just that: theirs to deal with. My struggle is to develop a thicker skin so I don't need to isolate to protect myself from what they project. I'd be tempted to believe that this dream might also indicate how I could be projecting some unacknowledged anger of my own on to them. However, that thought holds no resonance and feels more as if I'm trying to be the "good little child of an alcoholic" I was trained to be. I.e., taking responsibility for everyone else's shit. (And to be a bit afraid of their crap and what they might do in the name of it.) BTW, the use of the word shit reminds me: my apologies to anyone offended by such language. Recently it's been feeling dishonest and (in line with today's dream poem) angering to use less impactful words, when words like "shit" and "fuck" are what feel appropriate and right on. Photomorph "Spitting Mad" (7-28-09 4458v7a) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

LIFE MARKERS (photo) & MARKED (free verse dream poem) by Roswila

MARKED

why did they put a small
black tag on that infant?
I can see the shiny metallic tag
waving in the breeze
on the end of its fine
wiry white string
whenever someone
approaches
the heavily
swaddled
little body
why do they keep trying to deny
they've marked this baby
for life


[free verse poem on a dream of 5-8-18. N.B., although rather a "downer" as written, there is an additional possible reading for this dream/poem. I have a strong association to a little "tag" I've been keeping taped to my computer that says "Let things come to you." And babies often indicate something new and full of possibility. Also, a beautiful shiny black can be said to indicate "a positive view of the unconscious from which a new self and new potentials emerge" (from Bob Hoss's research on color in dreams). So although the feeling tone of this little dream was sad, something positive may very well come of whatever in my life precipitated it. Photo "Life Markers" (8-15-09 5469e) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

OUT OF THE WRECK (photomorph) & THE WRECK THIS TIME (mixed format dream poem) by Roswila

THE WRECK THIS TIME

these folk she would call
friends simply won't let her tell
her part of the story
yes, she was there when it all went down
but you'd think they'd never met her before

and, quite truthfully,
their exclusion of her from the tale
tells a deeper one
(if you'll pardon a different take):
♪ "It's still the same old story..." ♫

and so she stumbles
away yet again from what had
held so much promise:
folk she had thought welcoming
have ultimately forced her out,

like a stray bit of flotsam
rising from the wreck of hope


[three tanka and one two-liner on a dream of 4-29-18. Yeah, more of that self-pity that's been surfacing (like this poem's flotsam) in some of my dream/poems recently. But there is a vague implication of positivity in that final image. Something survives to go on despite the wreck(s). And, yes, that quoted line is from the famous song "As Time Goes By," which I sang a bit of in the actual dream. Photomorph "Out of the Wreck" 7-23-09 4124v4g) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

EBB & FLOW (photomorph) & ANYTHING FURTHER (non-dream free verse poem) by Roswila

ANYTHING FURTHER

what would it be like not to be possessed by
this compelling need to express experience, to
say to the world -- in word or picture, or even
gesture -- this is what I felt, saw, touched, and
more to the point of this ramble, this is where
it took my mind, an all too willing hostage:
as now, when I look up briefly to see blades
of grass bending gracefully like beckoning
fingers in full concert with each other on
every down stroke of the orchestrating
wind; well, that's more than enough
encouraging of that busy image
maker that takes possession
of my attention and will
with no warning at all:
why can't I ever just
have the moment,
letting it morph
as it may, or
even die
becalmed,
leaving
not even
a trace
urge to
make
more
of it
than
this:
a subtle
ebbing,
neither
needing
nor
auguring
anything
further
than
itself


[non-dream free verse poem written 4/28/18. Photomorph "Ebb & Flow" (4-13-18 009v3) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

GRASPING AFTER NOTHING (photomorph) & ROMANCE WITH TIME (Or: As Always) (non-dream free verse poem) by Roswila

ROMANCE WITH TIME
(Or: As Always)

she always imagines that in some
basic one-can-go-no-deeper, no
wider, no-further-beyond-consensus
reality,
that there's actually no time, yeah,
no time at all: that is, only space
exists, and at that, maybe only
vacuum
so massive and total her brain cells
can't maintain the thought of it;
when she reaches this point
in her inquiry, her brain
-- as always --
begins to feel as if it's wavering,
sloshing side to side, about
to spill out of the protective
custody of her skull, as if not only
her grip
on her thinking were failing, but that
her entire self -- bones, viscera, and all
-- can't maintain what it senses coming
on the trail of another attempt
to conceptualize nothing-at-all
... and yet ...
and yet, this threat of dissolution,
nay, of annihilation, seems almost
welcome, even as she turns her head
to check out what time it is on her
propped up
old flip phone, in its usual place
beside her even older recliner,
worried she's falling behind
-- as always


[non-dream free verse poem written 4-17-18. Photomorph "Grasping After Nothing" (4-13-18 008v3) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.