SO MANY CHANGES (photo) & AIDING & ABEDDING (on a dream) by Roswila

AIDING & ABEDDING

maybe reading her new, experimental short-
short-story (that took much courage to write,
much less to think of sharing), will get
the audience's attention for a change
(her usual poetry is, after all, somewhat
of an acquired taste)

but even as she stumbles (not common
for her as she always focuses and enunciates
carefully hoping to increase the chances
of being comprehended) she realizes
with a sickening lurch in her stomach
that no one's listening, not even
to her new, straightforward story
in its unembellished prose

stopping in mid-sentence she says
(and this they listen to)
I can't go on, I'm feeling ill

when she gets back to the comforting sick bed
that she'd forced herself to leave in order
to read her story to them, she finds a woman
from the audience has turned down the covers
and is holding out her nightgown to her

unbelievable! well, not really, she thinks,
similar scenarios have played out many
times before, but now she finally understands:

changing is so hard not just because she resists it,
but also because others in her life counteract it,
overtly or covertly encouraging her status quo
(no matter what they give lip service to, one's
supposed to remain, above all, predictable)

she slips sadly back into her sick bed
it's a rare person who's able to see and accept
another's hard won changes, much less
be willing to adjust their own trajectories
in the face of revisions to the plot
that they'd not expected


[on a dream of 3-25-16. Photo "So Many Changes" (5-24-15 009v2) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

SEEKING FOCUS (photomorph) & ON DUMPING (free verse dream poem) by Roswila

ON DUMPING

... searching for a way
to reorganize things ... hey,
this is getting to be too much
like my waking life

I get on with the sunny,
outdoors, acre spanning project,
even allowing myself to enjoy
the effort and consequent
aching joints, after all dreams
often bring something
new to the table

and this table's been moaning
under the load it bears,
stuff dumping more and more
onto the floor with each shift
of the towering layers of junk,
well, not all junk, not by far,
but certainly no longer needed,
if ever required or even useful at all

this discordant clutter I've feverishly
collected over the years, and endlessly
refined like some ersatz, post-modern,
performance art assemblage,
afraid to ignore, much less
leave behind anything

hm, so maybe that's not such a bad thing,
then, to let this free form dumping
have its head, so to speak, it's just
another way of reorganizing,
of letting go


[free verse poem on a dream of 3-24-16. Yes, this dream was mildly lucid (knowing one is dreaming as one is actually dreaming) at the beginning. Photomorph "Seeking Focus" (3-22-16 028v4) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

SINGING FOR THE MOON (photomorph) & MOON OF TWO SONGS (from a night's dreams) by Roswila

MOON OF TWO SONGS

"If I could save time in a bottle..."*
plays like a soundtrack for her first
dreams of the night, the full moon's
light singing wordless backup
through the white lace curtains each
time she wakes to turn over and away
from her yearning "...The first thing
I'd like to do is to save every day
'til eternity passes away
just to spend them with you..."

why the change of tune in this night
of aching she doesn't know, but the music
behind the last dreams sings out of her
as the faintest blush of sunrise
colors the curtains: "Sweet Caroline...**
I know it's growing strong ...
I look at the night and it don't
seem so lonely...," a mix of scintillating
sweet and sorrow rising as it always
does with that old song,

"... Hurting runs off my shoulders
How can I hurt when I'm holding you"


[on the songs that ran through the dreams of 3-23-16. *Snatches of lyrics from song of the same title by Jim Croce, and ** ditto by Neil Diamond. When I say I hear and/or sing songs in dreams the actual dream experience is exactly that, as if I were hearing and/or singing. Photomorph "Singing for the Moon" (9-29-12 12166v3a) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,





[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

REFLECTIONS IN A BLUE EYE (photomorph) & 'SPLAINING IT (free verse dream poem) by Roswila

'SPLAINING IT

Lucy, of "I Love Lucy" T.V. fame,
sits in bed against the headboard
as I wander barefoot back and forth
on the carpeted floor by the foot

we continue our companionable
discussion of Ricky (who else,
but her husband in both life
and the show) and his present
whereabouts and projects

she interjects an agitated explanation
that comes out of nowhere (at least
to my perception) that I really need
to understand it was OK that he left
the show and their marriage, it'd been
a necessary move, best for them both,
and that she bears him no ill will

it's my turn to feel a bit agitated,
yes (I assert with far more calm
than I feel), I've always understood
that, adding quickly how I still
follow Ricky's career
and have you heard about
that new project of his

there's almost an audible "pop"
as the tension leaves the conversation

we're both smiling as she nods
and gives me her famous, blue eyed
"innocent" stare, quoting herself
in the show as she'd make fun
of Ricky's fractured English
"You want to 'splain it to me?"


[free verse poem on a dream of 3-22-16. Hm, maybe I'm watching too much T.V. (smile). This reflects the second night in a row that a dream has referenced a T.V. show. Of course, it could also be a metaphor for learning to put a bit more distance between myself and "the world." I.e., become more of an observer, and less the agitated "undergoer." I hasten to add that both recently dreamed about T.V. shows have always carried strong associations to my past (yesterday's to my young adult years, and this one to my childhood). However, both are also acutely about the present, as well.] Photomorph "Reflections In A Blue Eye" (3-3-16 002v11b) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

SINK HOLE (photomorph) & OF HORSES AND BLACK HOLES (free verse dream poem) by Roswila

OF HORSES AND BLACK HOLES

he reminds me of that super-smart but socially dumb
Sheldon on T.V., but unlike that character who says:
“I’m not crazy, my mother had me tested,”*
this friend of ours is mentally ill, as they say
“high coping,” but suffering deeply nevertheless

as he and I, and the others of our small crew, try
to determine a place to hang out for the evening
(we’d settled on this empty apartment
but it won’t stay that way long, the residents
will be coming back from dinner very soon),
I trail him around the living room responding
to his personal agony that has nothing to do
with the search underway for a place to hang

hoping to offer him some gentle help, I tell him
I’ve been disciplining myself not to think of things
that I know will disturb me (all that stuff I'm well
aware of that will heat my thinking to a scalding boil),
and that this actually works sometimes

even as the last words fly irretrievably
out of my mouth I recall with whom I’m talking,
my cheeks flush with embarrassment,
and I'm more than a little bit sad

though my mind might often be like a runaway
horse that’s taken the bit in its teeth, his plummets
time and again, into new suffering as through
a random, rapidly spinning black hole, that dumps
him summarily into shifting, alien universes
where none of us can reach with our naive advice,
nor follow, not even in our vaunted imaginations


[free verse poem on a dream of 3-21-16. *Actually said by Sheldon of T.V.'s "The Big Bang Theory." "Sheldon" here is both a specific person, and a composite of others in my life (mostly from the past). In a way the dream is a lesson in being fully present for someone, letting go of believing I know what another's inner life is like. More importantly, it suggests that I let go of the need to help, and instead be a loving witness. I know how to do this, have done it. But I'd forgotten it, buried as it was beneath my own recently intensifying sturm und drang. I'm grateful the dream unearthed it as a response to a question I'd asked my dream world before I went to sleep last night. It's a surprising but very helpful answer. Photomorph "Sink Hole" (5-18-11 10998v3d) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blog (dedicated to her photos only, i.e. no poetry or other writing; daily post); TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.

AT THE FRINGES (photomorph) & THREE DREAM SYMBOLS (from three dreams of one night) by Roswila

THREE DREAM SYMBOLS

Dream One: he plays his space piano,
yes, out in space, floating around
(don't tell me you can't hear sound
in a vacuum, he's playing it and I
hear it!) and then he carefully folds
it up to stash it away on board
the huge shuttle; I approach him
shyly but hopefully (he seems friendly,
or at least the music had a welcoming
feel to it) "Could I borrow that incredible
traveling piano sometime? I'd be oh-so-
respectful of it and it would be lovely
to improvise on as I read my poetry,
I think it would hold the audience's
attention better than my words..."

Dream Two: on the computer screen
hangs (that's the only way to describe
it) an image of a large, black shawl-like
piece that's entirely long fringes,
the central ones red, forming a life-sized
human hand; I regretfully turn off
the computer but the shawl remains,
sliding down to my table top; I pick
it up and fling it lightly over my left
shoulder and shimmy away, saying
to a man whose interest I crave
"Does the hand look like it's waving?"

Dream Three: I donate a pile of stuff
to the soon to be closed Thrift Store,
wondering who will buy my large, empty
picture frame (dark and totally empty,
only air filling it's almost square shape);
not much later I see that man I'm
sort of friendly with but can't quite
get past a mild doubt about; he carries
the frame and he's filled it with something
that's totally Kelly green; I think
"And so I've been framed..."


[from three dreams of 3-20-16. I'm not going to pick these apart for "meaning." I've been enjoying just letting them open for me as they will. I will say it's sort of fun to have had a Kelly green symbol on the first night of spring, and that there does seem to be a theme running through them of trying to get attention. And I'm not sure that the last line is as completely negative as the usual meaning of that expression is (I've already had a positive association to it), though the fear of that is in there. Out of curiosity I just googled "red hand" and discovered it's on the Irish flag for the county of Ulster...hm. Then there's that expression "caught red-handed..." I can't help but wonder, though, if that red hand of Ulster isn't related to my waiting for my DNA analysis results. I've always doubted my father's side of the family was as Irish as they claimed, so maybe the analysis will settle that for me. Photomorph "At the Fringes" (5-18-11 11002u) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blogs: ROSWILA'S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL; ROSWILA'S TAIGA TAROT; TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT; and THE MARKER TAROT.

THE VAGARIES OF MEMORY (photomorph) & FORENSIC FILES: Dreamtime (free verse dream poem) by Roswila

FORENSIC FILES: Dreamtime

yes, I know, we had it all figured out
based on that series of street cam videos:
he shot and killed that person

and now I can't find in the videos where we
clearly saw his car, and his arm coming
out of the window aiming, then...kaboom!

how can this happen? tapes don't just
re-record themselves, all on their own,
do they? write over what was there before,
wiping it all out?

and, even so, what happened
still happened, didn't it?

didn't it? if not, what can be relied on
as real and true?


[free verse poem on a dream of 3-19-16. This dream was in response to a rather convoluted and needy question I asked of my dreams before I went to sleep last night. And, believe it or not, is actually a very positive answer. I read it as suggesting that I should deeply question what I think/believe, while also reflecting my anxiety at the mere thought of doing so. Photomorph "The Vagaries of Memory" (5-18-11 10994v7) by Roswila]

PLEASE NOTE: in most browsers you can click on the above image for a larger version. Also, the photo accompanying a post is not necessarily meant to illustrate it, but to reflect some small, even slant aspect of the verse, similar to Japanese haiga (illustrated haiku).

There are many other sorts of posts on this blog. I indicate which are about or influenced by dreams. Some non dream focused posts are book reviews, "regular" poems (some by other writers, as the above is), scifaiku, writing exercises, Tarot haiku, photos, haiga, and so on. However, most of those are in much older posts. There's a listing by month going back to early 2006, at the end of the sidebar.

* * * *

until next time, keep dreaming,

[a/k/a Patricia Kelly]
**** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's other blogs: ROSWILA'S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL; ROSWILA'S TAIGA TAROT; TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT; and THE MARKER TAROT.