Roswila's Dream & Poetry Realm

SEE ALSO: TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT (photos, realistic to abstract)

Monday, January 03, 2011

ALL DAILY DREAMKU, TANKA, & PHOTOS POSTED IN DECEMBER 2010 by Roswila

Hope the holidays brought only the best and most blessed into your lives.

I’m gearing up for my 67th birthday tomorrow. I simply cannot believe another year has flown by. Hopefully this next one will show some steady improvement. I don’t ask for or expect a lot of it, just some positive change that actually stays around and doesn’t get totally squashed under more terrible mood swings.

Here’s a sample dreamku from the month (dated December 17th):

SKY LIGHTS

what’s that happening
way up there ... there! ... in the sky
my stomach flips

passenger plane lights
two smaller planes’ lights below ...
fighter planes! ... no ...
just a memory of those
awful days after 9/11

and that tall cloud
shaped like a wise sorcerer
or maybe hermit
no, just a young man stepping
down out of the busy sky

he’s to be my friend I wonder why and how





ALL DAILY DREAMKU, DREAM TANKA, AND PHOTOS BY ROSWILA POSTED IN DECEMBER 2010

[PLEASE NOTE that in most browsers you can click on the image for a larger version.]



December 1, 2010


THE ROW TO HOE

Dream 1:

joyful announcement
she’s chosen a new career:
horticulture
a lifetime of accounting
does not and never did serve

Dream 2:

her bedroom doorway’s
white and extremely narrow
can I fit through it
to do what I was hired to:
support her recovery


[a dream tanka on each of two separate dreams of 11-30-10. Image by Roswila]



December 2, 2010


BEDFELLOWS

the dog in her bed
scares her with its snarling
it falls back to sleep
curled up on her stomach as
she lies stiffly and worries

she tries calling out
for her father softly
so it won’t wake up
the terrier lifts its head
flashing a toothsome threat


[two tanka on a dream of 12-1-10. Image by Roswila]



December 3, 2010


FOILED

the very young foal
needs to be safely contained
or watched constantly
I make an ersatz corral
on the room’s light grey carpet

I believe the foal’s
long legs and high energy
will be foiled by the fence
my friend observes both me
and the foal, very amused

she’s right of course up and over almost like flight

[two tanka and a monoku on a dream of 12-2-10. Image by Roswila]



December 4, 2010


SNAPPING

in the dead of night
my bedside cell phone rings
I’m jarred wide awake

the speaker’s accent
so thick I can’t understand
what gets through to me
is someone told her to call
from the hospital for them

that they just must have
something from me right away
frustration rises
I demand she put someone
on the phone who speaks English

cell phone minutes burn
as I wait and wait on hold
the next woman’s English
is clear but she makes no more sense
it’s a wrong number or scam

I snap my cell shut the dark gulps the sound

[a dreamku, three tanka, and a monoku on a dream of 12-3-10. Image by Roswila]



December 5, 2010


BABY BUMPS

I’m too late to help
whenever she enters the room
again and again
this sweet-natured infant bumps
her forehead on the chair rungs

her wide-eyes backing up she finds her own way

[a tanka and a monoku on a dream of 12-5-10. Image by Roswila]



December 6, 2010


THREE ON A DREAM

a child’s blue ball
August’s only harvest
after all my work

* * * *

an admission by
the single one inclined to
be at all friendly
she’d placed those fake fruits in the
vine’s shadows for me to find

* * * *

my blind friend’s cell call
to his realtor reaches me
why does he pretend
I’m whom I’m not and ask
for what I cannot do

* * * *

[a dreamku and two tanka on three aspects of the same dream of 12-5-10. Image by Roswila]



December 7, 2010


THE WAY

she realizes
the subway’s now running
on the other side
stairs up to it are slim loaves
of buttered and sliced bread

a perilous climb
as each slice flaps open
under her shod step
she holds on to a railing
across a gulf on the left

a young man in back
closes each bread slice as it
flaps open under her foot
he points out the railing to
her right that’s much closer

she clings to the left the right’s no support at all

[three tanka and a monku on a dream of 12-6-10. Image by Roswila]



December 8, 2010



[I actually have a dreamku series drafted but no time to polish it for posting, so I'll save it either for tomorrow or some other future posting. Here's one of the sky shots I've been taking. As you can tell, we've been having some rainy weather. I'm constantly amazed at how taking photos continues to widen and open up what I observe and enjoy as I go about my day. Frequently, I can look at almost anything and in my mind's eye be framing a possible shot. This means I see so much more than I ever have. Even though writing poetry had already opened up my observing eye quite a bit over the years. Guess I should remember this, especially given how hopeless I've been feeling recently: there's always more to be seen, to be embraced, to be part of. Image by Roswila]




December 9, 2010


COVER UP

we each arrive in our homes end of vacation

I’ve no clothes for work
all that fit are yet to come
back from the hotel
we’d not known they’d hold our
clothes nor charge for delivery

mad scramble to cover up maybe I’ll call in sick

[two monoku and one tanka on a dream of 12-7-10. Image by Roswila]



December 10, 2010


noted in the dream:
there’s still something not right with
the woman’s left eye
however her poetry’s
improving apace

[tanka on a dream of 12-8-10. Image by Roswila]



December 11, 2010


ACTING

the young singer acts out no self-control

she accepts help from
others who’ll be her watchers
they set clear limits

my sympathy
runs deep with her plight
I’ll teach her to dance

she tries to lindy with me awkward first steps

[a monoku and two dreamku written on 4-21-10 on old dream notes of 8-30-07. Image by Roswila]



December 12, 2010


MEETING OF HEARTS

observe this closely
and use your shorthand for notes!
shadowy meeting rooms

you can clearly see
the need to be acknowledged
join in the applause!

and now you can hear
anxiety and concern
the same as your own
acknowledge these connections
and keep them in your heart

[two dreamku and a tanka on a dream of 12-11-10. Image by Roswila]



December 13, 2010


WHITE ELEPHANT

he prejudices
her relatives against her
family house sale

even should she know
if their home has sold as yet
he’s the boss, not her
what’s more nothing could be said
legally this soon anyway

they all deny their pique her shoulders ache

[a dreamku, tanka, and monoku on a dream of 12-12-10. Image by Roswila]



December 14, 2010


[My dreams last night were quite varied but much like the above photo in ultimate effect. I feel on watch today, like that seagull, is the sky clearing or going stormy, or will the day just stay uniformly gray? The sky outside my window this morning is lightly overcast and is largely what prompted my choice of the above photo. Image by Roswila]



December 15, 2010


THE SKY IS FALLING

a huge slab of rock
thrusts from the mountainside
sunburnt shelf

it starts to melt
hot boulders drip off
toward our town below

I point at them
in agitated silence
am I Henny Penny

[re-posting of a dreamku series on a dream of 7-24-09. Image: “Orange Crush” by Roswila]



December 16, 2010


[Photo "Make A Wish" by Roswila.]



December 17, 2010


SKY LIGHTS

what’s that happening
way up there ... there! ... in the sky
my stomach flips

passenger plane lights
two smaller planes’ lights below ...
fighter planes! ... no ...
just a memory of those
awful days after 9/11

and that tall cloud
shaped like a wise sorcerer
or maybe hermit
no, just a young man stepping
down out of the busy sky

he’s to be my friend I wonder why and how

[a dreamku, two tanka, and a monoku on a dream of 12-16-10. My experience of the days after the collapse of the Twin Towers in New York city where I was living at that time, is an apt metaphor for how I’ve been feeling. And I suppose that young man might be the “new normal” that kept being touted at the time. I.e., things would never feel or be normal again, but we’d find a “new normal.” Image by Roswila]



December 18, 2010


A TALL STORY

escape mechanism
from the sky scraper’s top floor
my turn to get out

it’s clear I won’t fit
through any one of the slots
on to the tube-sling
I lie down atop the slots
and slide down the mechanism

I ride feet first
instinctively, with my arms
folded on my chest
arrival below is swift
smooth and comfortable

as the tube-sling slows
I hear announced “This trip’s for
6 foot to 5 six”
“Now they tell us!” I grouse,
fortunately, I’m 5 foot nine

[a dreamku and three tanka on a dream of 12-17-10. Image by Roswila]



December 19, 2010


QUESTING

I wend my way through
corridor after corridor
quest for understanding

a man blocks my way
he’s clearly merciless
and bent on assault
my intense fear elicits
a mean grin and harsher handling

then from behind him
a younger man brandishing
a gun aimed at me
my goose cooked just because
I sought to understand

“No,” I quickly think
“This dream scene ends right now!”
in a new scenario
I search for my good friend
in a crowded stadium-beach

[a dreamku and three tanka on a dream of 12-19-10. A vaguely lucid dream – knowing one is dreaming as one is actually dreaming – at least at that one point in the third tanka. This particular lucid action is something I’ve done before; though I rarely have nightmares they are very memorable. In the past I’ve made the intense effort to deliberately wake myself up to avoid the nightmare. This is the first time that I just willfully switched what I was dreaming about and stayed asleep. Image by Roswila]



December 20, 2010


CALLING

she waits for a call
on the cell that I’d loaned her
messages pile up
for me that I need to hear
I tell her I’ll check them quickly

he over hears us
and tells me the number to call
for my messages
also that he’ll get me
a better phone and service

I’m P.O.’d – my phone,
service, and memory are fine
why all this “fixing”
if it isn’t “broken”
I retrieve my messages

[three tanka on a dream of 12-20-10. Image by Roswila]



December 21, 2010


EMPTY CHEST

“only love can break
a heart, only love can mend
it again...” I sing
this old song each time I wake
sadness seeping through the night

would that my heart broke
like a demolished building
dust and rubble
exploding with percussive force
in the land scape of my life ...

or even slid away
a barren rain-soaked hillside
rumbling to a dark sea ...
but it was simply not there
one day when I searched for it

empty chest: treasure
no longer offered or received --
a heart’s what it shares

[three tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 12-20-10. Image by Roswila]



December 22, 2010



carefully placing
thorn tree twigs in my bedroom
so I won’t get pricked
why put them there at all?
“Thorns come out of the Light”

[old tanka on an old dream of 7-6-07. Image: "Winter Tree" by Roswila]



December 23, 2010


BACK ON THE JOB

I’m back on the job
she proceeds to teach me how
to enter the data
this former young boss whom I’d
always enjoyed working for

it’s good to be back
feeling competent and liked
more new skills to learn

[a tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 12-21-10. Image by Roswila]



December 24, 2010


FULL MOON

her full moon belly
I pat it affectionately
"When are you due?"

"Any second now"
she says, and describes the small
vaguely pointed thing
the doctors had her swallow
to start long-overdue labor

[a dreamku and a tanka on a dream of 12-22-10. Image: “Night Lights” by Roswila]



December 25, 2010


MERRY CHRISTMAS!

[Image by Roswila, taken during the recent "Pineapple Express" rain storms here in CA; THE DAILY DREAMKU POST IS IMMEDIATELY BELOW...]



[No dream recall, except that I woke up singing "Send in the Clowns." Which then put me in mind of the above photo of mine by the same title. I'd say the song lyrics pretty much tend to apply across the board of my life. Maybe this rather on-going clown-sadness I have always felt is a symptom of my being so right-brain oriented. I read recently that research indicates our right brain feeling tone tends to be sadness. This photo is also appropriate as it's looking like rain again out there. But if the forecast is accurate it shouldn't be a deluge like earlier this week. Image "Send in the Clowns" by Roswila]



December 26, 2010


PLEASE DON’T

please don’t take away
this warm comforting darkness
leave it free of threat
this long curving closeness
like a familiar horse’s flank

may only quiet
and ease be curried from this
memory-dream
this lightning flash image that
flees as deep sleep arrives

[two tanka on a dream of 12-25-10. Image by Roswila]



December 27, 2010


GOT GAME?

“Everybody’s got
game, even him,” I think
at least this player
acknowledges my presence
and has a sense of humor

[a tanka on a dream of 12-25-10. Image: "Tree Climbing" by Roswila]



December 28, 2010


NO MEAN CHALLENGE

we line up for class
the task: circle the edges
of this living room
after instruction we start
feeling our way around

no mean challenge we’re all blind

[a tanka and a monoku on a dream of 12-26-10. This dream was neutral in emotional tone, except for some brief laughter (not written into the above) when I had to clamber over two women lying in my way on the carpet. However, my immediate association on waking was to the psychological horror story THE YELLOW WALLPAPER. The story disturbed me deeply when I read it many, many years ago and whenever reminded of it’s images of being trapped, not listened to, and hallucination I’m agitated again. The trigger for the association to this story? The suffering narrator/protagonist winds up circling her room, tearing down the yellow wall paper from which she’s been helping women escape. Ultimately, clambering over her passed-out husband, again and again as she circles. Image by Roswila]



December 29, 2010


SITUATIONAL

the diplomat saves
elephants in an eastern
island country
his demure* aide-de-camp
native to this young nation

a love affair
that would never have been
back in the States
heats and boils over quickly
in this exotic crisis

she and embassy
staff assume he’ll leave his wife
all support their love
his sad eyes as all celebrate
rescuing the elephants

“Relationships are
situation specific”
my last dreaming thought

[three tanka and a dreamku on a dream of 12-27-10. Image by Roswila] * demure = I’ve set myself the challenge of using one word from the book by Dr. Robert Beard ”The 100 Most Beautiful Words in English” in every dreamku post until I’ve used them all. Just for the fun of it, but also to perk up my language a bit. I’ve noticed that I’ve been slipping into less interesting words and phrasing. This is partly due to the requirements of writing in small forms. However, by being a bit more conscious I think I can counteract this somewhat.



December 30, 2010


[No viable dream recall for last night, which is a little surprising given that I was in our residence's Talent Show last night. I suffer from such awful stage fright it usually impacts my dreams right away. For the first time I tried sharing a print of one of my photos with each of my poems that I read. Inviting folk to stay after the show if they wanted to see them better, as our shows are in our small theater and I knew the photos would not be clear but for those folk in the front rows. The photo above is from those I held up. Image by Roswila] * As noted yesterday, I’ve set myself the challenge of using one word from the book by Dr. Robert Beard ”The 100 Most Beautiful Words in English” in every dreamku post until I’ve used them all. But given I wrote no dreamku for last night and so that this list will not fall into desuetude after only one word, I used a word from the list just now in the comments. I started doing this mostly for the fun of it, but also to perk up my language a bit.



December 31, 2010


[The Daily Dreamku appears immediately below]



THE MORE THINGS CHANGE...

lightened or darkened
cropped smaller or reverted
to original size
the torn picture does not change,
this ancient imbroglio*

[a tanka on all recalled dreams of 12-30-10. I say “dreams” because the theme of having a frustrating time editing photos peppered my dreams last night. I don’t particularly feel like commenting today. I’m at that place I’ve been coming to rather more often than usual. Which is, maybe it’s better to let the dream/ku speak for themselves. Image by Roswila. * imbroglio = is the word I chose today from the list in the book by Dr. Robert Beard ”The 100 Most Beautiful Words in English” Just for the fun of it, but also to perk up my language a bit. I’ve noticed that I’ve been using less interesting words and phrasing. This is partly due to the requirements of writing in small forms. However, by being a bit more conscious I think I can counteract this somewhat.]


* * * *

‘til next time, keep dreaming,





**** [aka: Patricia Kelly] **** If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”)****My other blogs: ROSWILA’S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL and ROSWILA’S TAIGA TAROT, and Yahoo DREAMJIN: Group for Dreamku – Haiku-Like Dream Poems ****