NO EXIT (photo) & SONG OF THE HYPOCHONDRIAC (mixed format dream poem) by Roswila

SONG OF THE HYPOCHONDRIAC

the head nurse whispers
to me that the hospital wing
has a benefactor
someone who donates regularly
keeping their level of care high

she then turns away
and signs the release form for
a homeless man
I start chatting with the man
as we hobble from the hospital

I'd only been visiting, I say, to which he
wryly responds, isn't that what we all say

and pointing to another old homeless guy
adding that he has a list of excuses, too

it might as well have been a ton of bricks
he'd lobbed at me as the realization hits:

I'd been making myself sick and needy
then covering this skewed tactic with denial

and sealing it up with drama to muffle the core
so I can't hear it crying: "What I did for love"*


[two tanka with five two-liners on a dream of 4-27-15, dreamed/written during my blog break. *"What I Did For Love," song from the musical "A Chorus Line." I didn't hear this in the dream. Synchronistically, it was being sung when I turned on the T.V. the morning after I had this dream. These are the lyrics that punched right through me: "Stitch myself up, then I do it again // I can't believe (I can't believe) what I did for love // What I did for love." BTW, this dream references maladaptive strategies I've unconsciously used to "get" love in any of its forms, not just romantic. The dream was a response to an incubating question before going to sleep, that I did not consciously think of as having to do with love. And I'll admit that until I heard the song, the dream poem I was drafting in my mind had been headed some place quite different. The song hauled me up short. I should also comment on the hospital benefactor. This feels like some "higher" aspect of my psyche that has been caring for me without my full awareness, even as I've tried all these maladaptive strategies. N.B., "hypochrondiac" is a metaphor. I'm doctor/ hospital/ medicine/ treatment avoidant, in the extreme. Hm, I suppose the shadow side of that would be an unconscious hypochondria, though. Photo "No Exit" ( 5-7-15 10002e2) by Roswila]

BRIEF INTRODUCTION TO DREAMKU (& PHOTOS):

But first, a request: please let me know of any typos or other sorts of blunders in my posts. As my eyes age I'm finding more mistakes are creeping into what I put up here no matter how many times I proof it all. Thanks for any help!

The dream-based poems posted on this blog -- dreamku, tanka, two-liners, monoku, free verse, dream narratives -- are offered in the spirit of collaboration. I have done my part. Now it’s your turn to jump in and see what comes up for you. I.e., there is no right or wrong way to relate to any of these dream offerings. Even my own understandings of them change over time. And it gives me joy when a reader sees something in any of them that I have not. (This all applies to any of the non-dream poems posted here, too.)

Also please note that a dream poem or narrative is not intended as an interpretation of a dream, or even a complete and accurate rendering of one. It is my attempt to get down dream imagery/action that grabs me and, as I write about it, elicits my conscious written association and response. Nor do I believe that one has to remember dreams in order for them to do their work. In my understanding, we are much more than our conscious selves.

You may also note in any further reading on dreamku (the specific forms of dreamku, tanka, two-liners and monoku) you may do here, that in the beginning I stressed "showing, not telling." However, this has been changing for some time. I now tend to "show" (the dream story) and cap if off with a "tell" (some reaction and/or insight I've had to the dream as I was writing about it). This also pretty much applies to my free verse dream poems as well. As to what I have begun calling dream narratives, they are a different animal, probably most akin to prose poems.

For more in-depth exploration of the dreamku forms specifically and one post in which I also address my photo choices:

-- very brief comparison of dreamku and haiku: DREAMKU ARE NOT HAIKU

-- a brief post about both dreamku and my photos THE AREN'TS OF DREAMKU & ACCOMPANYING DIGITAL PHOTOS.

-- detailed three-part post about dreamku: "A DREAMKU PRIMER: Writing Haiku-Like Poems About Your Night Dreams": PART ONE: Introduction & Writing Dreamku as Dream Work; PART TWO: Elements of the Haiku Form Used in Dreamku; and PART THREE: How to Write Dreamku (the second and third parts have some overlap).

-- a short up-dating post about the three-part "A DREAMKU PRIMER" -- Important Up-date to A DREAMKU PRIMER....".

* * * *

‘til next time, keep dreaming,







If you wish to copy or use any of my writing or poems, please email me for permission (under “View my complete profile”). Roswila's connections & other blogs: Charter Member of the United Haiku and Tanka Society (UHTS); ROSWILA’S TAROT GALLERY & JOURNAL; ROSWILA’S TAIGA TAROT; and TRYING TO HOLD A BOX OF LIGHT.